i had two lifting goals on my wishlist before going under the knife and one came true today. i brought up the idea of bench press with the green plates and my physio not only didn’t reject the idea, but he offered to spot me. i wasn’t confident i could do one on my own but somehow i did it three times without having him come in. it’s nice that he has more confidence in me that i’m not as weak as i thought. it’s a good feeling touching the green plates after not having done so since injury
tested out front squats on the empty bar last week and took three tries before i found a position my shoulder could handle. tried for the second time today with much more ease, felt good enough i decided to put on another twelve kilograms. it’s amazing how much a little bit of time and confidence does. it’s finally showing signs of the november gains i had
lifting has been inconsistent in february and i haven’t been able to carry out my regular workouts. deadlifts felt horrible on my back even at ten kilograms below working weight. all the other lifts were progressing nicely. the range of motion in my bench press has increased and has surpassed the weight i was working with prior to the setback in december. every slow but steady progress in my shoulder me gives me a bit of confidence
2023 has been a year of lessons in strength, perseverance and most importantly patience. there were countless moments of doubts that wavered my confidence in my many pursuits. i chose to share my experience few and far between but i’m truly grateful for the ones who took me under their care, handled me from day one and became my pillar of support when i can’t be strong
this year’s experiences taught me to see the silver lining amidst every thunderstorm and certainly renewed my sense of appreciation. i have poured an immense amount of energy and fought hard to get to this point – i’m not looking back
2024 will be a year focused on rebuild. one step at a time, i won’t stop fighting for everything i’ve always wanted and make this a comeback to remember
visit to sports medicine doctor didn’t yield positives and instead brought more doubts. it brought back surgery talks which i haven’t actively thought about the past weeks and months. with how things flared up, it’s certain my level of confidence has decreased letting doubts seep in once again. although i’ve stayed relatively level headed since day one, my mood has been directly related to taking care of this
physio gave the green light to try flips for the first time since he began treating me and did a heavy tape job in preparation for the session. honestly i was quite scared but he seemed to have more confidence in me than i did. i had a small panic moment during my warmups when i heard loud cracks come from both shoulders in succession, but it calmed down and i was able to resume. after a few flips on blue, i surprisingly had enough courage to try it on the floor without a spotter. i couldn’t believe i pulled it off on my first try and landed back on my feet. this day was nineteen weeks in the making and i’m so happy it went well. i left the gym extremely content knowing the work put into rehab is worth every bit. i sent physio the footage of the back flip and he approves
first flightclub open gym session since february and i was worried i wouldn’t remember how to do any tricks. first and foremost, i wanted to move around but throwing an unspotted back tuck would be nice to have. i thought i would start from scratch and warmup in the pit for as long as i need before having the confidence to throw it, but i went for it only after a few jumps. this already made me really happy, but what made the session even better was throwing a wall flip. that one took a lot of timer jumps and pacing back and forth before i finally convinced myself to go for it. it’s nice to have retained some muscle memory even after such a long break
after several weeks of no tricking, i wasn’t expecting anything except getting the feel of moving again. most of my routine moves are still there which is just me relying on muscle memory to kick in. i hope i never lose these moves until i’m sixty, but i don’t expect to be going head over heels at that age. i liked the quiet session because honestly i’m too shy to show let my sub par tricks be seen at this point. hopefully at some point i’ll be confident enough to throw tricks in front of bigger groups
my butterfly twist successfully found the purple floor again tonight. in fact, four times successful which is infinitely more than any given session. some days, i struggle even on blue mat so i couldn’t be happier because there hasn’t been any floor attempts since i first landed almost a year ago. i’m aware it still needs a lot of fine tuning, but getting the confidence to make attempts on floor is huge. the btwists were huge, but not to forget the several websters that felt way more solid than any previous attempts
starting the year off with a light tricking session. tricking has taken a back seat with all the priorities and responsibilities that kept piling ever since my studio was secured. i haven’t had the time nor energy to train anything when i’m working insanely long hours every day. i didn’t feel comfortable leaving the ground, so i mainly stayed grounded and working on improving the type of hook kick i’ve acquired since re-training them last week. i only did websters onto the foam pit blue and even then only landed on my butt
the last few week my platform lifts have been treating me well. it’s been a very rewarding feeling working back to this point after going through some bad times with my shoulder since late august. every part of the lifts feel in it’s place and i haven’t had a missed lift throughout the whole month of november. i don’t think as much before each lift and just let my body do its work. now i’m working on building up my confidence to make bigger increments when warming up to my working set weights
the editing of the short fight scene i did with my friend over the weekend is done. i personally was happy with how it turned out, but i didn’t post it on any media because i wasn’t sure if it was good and i was scared i’d get bashed. it surprisingly got some positive feedback from others who leaked the video. i’m happy my friends thought i had improved movements and reactions. i would like to film more and get more practice in. i can only get better from here and hope that one day i’ll be confident enough to post my work
at apex on a wednesday for a makeup session from the past sunday’s triple header. really satisfied when i hit my top set forty four kilogram mid hang snatch. as i continue to lift, i learn more about myself and recognize that my mental game lacks confidence. a lot of my dropped lifts isn’t because it’s a weight i can’t handle, but rather too much self doubts to finish strong. this is the part of me i hope to work on more to become a better athlete all around. i coach, i train, but i realized lifting brings the most serious face out of me
whipped out my phone to film how my current back tucks look like. i left my phone for a bit and so many of these photos appeared in my album. my back tucks are looking more ‘complete’; it certainly evolved a lot since the first ones. the confidence and consistency has improved tremendously and the landing is a slightly softer and more controlled. i’m still working on my set to get more height in this flip so i can have an even softer landing which would be easier on my ankles
i wasn’t pressing to regain confidence in my back tuck after necking it, but i’m happy to say i got it back only nine days since. thinking it’s time to ease myself into the x-out, i pleasantly progressed back onto the floor in just one day. i’m even happier i actually have some moves i can now sync with others. it really does help when i get to do it alongside one of the best. not only does it push me to go for it, it also allows me to study and compare what he’s doing batter and what i can do to get mine better. this is by far the best x-out i’ve ever done on floor and feeling grateful for all the support he’s given me
a few weeks ago, my roundoff didn’t look remotely like a roundoff. i made up my mind that i wanted to change that so i worked on it every class, it’s really come a long way since. deep down, i ultimately wanted the roundoff backtuck but i didn’t want to press for it and waited for my coaches to have confidence in me first cause clearly i didn’t. it was offered today and i’m very happy i chose to go for the roundoff backtuck at the end of today’s session. i went home really feeling really satisfied knowing that i’ve taken a big step towards attaining what i’ve always wanted
it was one of those few flip sessions where my flips felt pretty strong. signs of improvement in my back tuck where i landed some solid ones both spotted and unspotted. cart front off the air track felt pretty good; good enough i even gave front twist a few tries. randomly revisited websters and for the first time, landed on my feet in the red. i think i have what it takes to land them, but i do know it’s a lack of confidence, which was also pointed out. i’m really aiming to hit something in january. there’s a few things on the top of my list: roundoff back tuck, gainer, moon kick, flash kick, and websters are amongst my top
on the ground for hours icing and rolling myself out after feeling the pains of a pull. i hadn’t noticed any pain or spasm until i got home and adrenaline wore off. prior to that, i had gone to class to work on more combos, cheat seven twenties, cartwheels and back tucks. i was quite pleased with my stuff today especially getting a handful of back tuck practices in with less spot. i feel better about it and it’s just a matter of getting the confidence now to making it over with no hesitation. in the meantime, i’m doing everything possible to alleviate this pain sensation i’m feeling done my back; and an appointment is upcoming
a steady development in my game lately as a result of playing with the higher tiers, receiving pointers, and just getting more ice time. a good day of hockey for me that started off well in britannia, but drop in is where it clicked; even with my aching body and tired legs, i felt strong on my skates. i thought i played a solid game gaining more confidence on the ice whether carrying the puck, driving to the net and playing good positioning. it’s nice when the opposing players compliment on your game, especially the goalie on my shot. it makes me smile a little he said i have a dangerous shot cause both speed and accuracy is there. i hate it when opposing guys take my lightly just because i’m a girl, but the fact they check me harder is a sign of gaining respect
manager taking me out for lunch followed by a review over coffee. together, we discussed a lot about direction and devised an action plan to get me there. he saw me as one that could grow and take on a leadership position. he then asked me what were things i could improve on; i knew where it was going before he even finished his question. two things really stood out to him – he wanted me to be more confident and more decisive
tongtongvision 