day 2320 – low life

sleepless on a sunday night does not bode well for monday morning. i needed a coffee first thing when i got into work. i couldn’t help but stay awake thinking and overthinking of all the things i may have to give up. i can’t stop myself from crying thinking my life as an athlete could come to an abrupt end. i hadn’t done all that i wanted to accomplish and i clearly hadn’t expected it to approach so soon. i can’t stand to open up and tell many of my injury status so keeping it to myself was my next best option

day 2233 – flip talks

during the late night dinner with the crew, had a bit of a truth moment when the topic of competition came up. deep down i know i want to compete, but being removed from the competition field for quite some time is a big obstacle. i know for me to make a comeback, i put a lot of pressure on myself to only compete when i’m confident i can do well; i just want to ensure i’m at my best. but as of right now so many factors are standing in my way and instilling so many doubts. for one, my foot is a problem because it’s not letting me have my preferred techniques. i can’t work on my roundoff combos and i avoid kicking combos whenever possible

day 2004 – roundoff game

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a few weeks ago, my roundoff didn’t look remotely like a roundoff. i made up my mind that i wanted to change that so i worked on it every class, it’s really come a long way since. deep down, i ultimately wanted the roundoff backtuck but i didn’t want to press for it and waited for my coaches to have confidence in me first cause clearly i didn’t. it was offered today and i’m very happy i chose to go for the roundoff backtuck at the end of today’s session. i went home really feeling really satisfied knowing that i’ve taken a big step towards attaining what i’ve always wanted