day 2004 – roundoff game

a few weeks ago, my roundoff didn’t look remotely like a roundoff. i made up my mind that i wanted to change that so i worked on it every class, it’s really come a long way since. deep down, i ultimately wanted the roundoff backtuck but i didn’t want to press for it and waited for my coaches to have confidence in me first cause clearly i didn’t. it was offered today and i’m very happy i chose to go for the roundoff backtuck at the end of today’s session. i went home really feeling really satisfied knowing that i’ve taken a big step towards attaining what i’ve always wanted

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day 1948 – aerial

i was really close to landing one on last class but i wronged myself for not giving it a villiant effort and i was super hard on myself after the fact. i didn’t think i’d land one today based on the condition of my body. one after another, the coach pushed me harder and harder to land it. i really couldn’t stand the disappointment again. i had to push through the pain one after the other. it wasn’t the cleanest of aerials, but a first is a first. i went home with my sore body, but happy and grateful he had pushed for it. i would have regrets if disappointed myself again

day 1906 – front tuck landed

i’m calling this my first official front tuck landed on the floor even though i had one last week that i wasn’t satisfied with. i was hesitant to attempt again; they sensed it but were still adamant on it from the get go. the pressure was strong and everyone had their eyes on me as i warmed myself up on the mats. i was feeling really iffy on the first ones, but eventually stuck a landing. i’m thankful they believed i could and gave me all the support possible. sometimes i need to be pushed; i wouldn’t have done it otherwise if they weren’t forcing it on me

sun run v3. 0

the sun run did not come stress-free nor pain-free. when i registered, i was in it to get my personal best time. prior to beginning any training, i wanted a finish in the fifties. as the months passed by, my confidence wavered, but i was still hoping for a sub sixty finish. as the final week rolled around, i knew i was in trouble. my knee cap was busted after taking a diving stab at the ball during handball, and i couldn’t walk without it being taped. i probably shouldn’t even be participating in the race; wasn’t sure if i could cover ten kilometre, let alone run it. when it’s all said and done, my third sun run was in the books. considering that made me sit out all week in hopes to preserve everything i had left in that knee, i did more than survive. it was more than a challenging character building for myself, not only because cardio had always been my weak point, but also for the condition i had to deal with. no, i didn’t make my sub sixty goal, and i’m not disappointed. i could’ve easily taken the easy route and backed out, i could have walked it, but i chose neither. my hour and three minutes finish was good for second in the company team. i kept up a good pace and ran continuously for the first five kilometres before any short stints of walking. at the end i still had some left in the tank to sprint through the finish line. i was tired, but felt susprisely good post ten kilometres. once again it’s proof about my character; if i set my mind to something, i won’t give up easily or back down from any challenges. i’m grateful for those who ran alongside me, who chose to give me words of encouragement even when i looked a little down and out. now that it’s all said and done, i will visit my physio to fix my knee before i decided on what challenges to take on next

day 1606 – photorefractive

didn’t end up having surgery done for my thumb back in october, but i certainly am having one done today. it took quite some courage to pull the trigger but prk finally done in the books. it’s a huge trigger and a huge change that i gladly braved, knowing it will be miserable during recovery stages. it involved a large sum, but i’m all in to making everything about my future brighter. rarely do i make clear cut decisions, but this one i made with confidence, for it will pay dividends in the long run

day 1590 – grip and pinch

another vgh rehab visit, first whirlpool therapy, then some wax therapy, then physical therapy. also did a couple functional tests and found out some interesting info. i found out i remain deviations above the standard with most of my strength, that is for anything that doesn’t require that one thumb. hand therapist was obviously trying to tell me be patient when there’s progress, but i really was only interested in knowing one thing. she left me with plenty of homework, all of which is fifty repetitions of things to do with balls and with bands

day 1584 – over and done

it’s finally made official, but deep down i know it’s over for the better. the decision to leave at one of my most critical time was already a telling tale; but i learned to bare next to no expectations from then on. if i was able to survive that storm alone, i’d be able to manage others just fine. i don’t understand why i held on even when i wasn’t happy, when letting go makes me hurt less. lots of things are about to change. it’s time to reset myself and get back to understanding what my own priorities don’t need to live in the shadows of everyone else’s