day 2464 – messed ankle

i was utterly concerned all night thinking i wouldn’t be able to walk like last time. knew more so, i was in despair that a simple hit on my ankle could cause the ganglion on my foot to flare up like such. i had to cancel my apex session in the morning, but still wanted to go forward with the garage lift because two others were banking on me. through the whole workout and the rest of the day, i was super grumpy thinking of all the problems it may have and all the limitations i may have to deal with. this isn’t good leading up to my birthday. even though it was friday where i should’ve earned my week end treat, i didn’t feel deserving of it and was in no mood to enjoy any

day 2163 – sharing difficulties

a subpar session and horrible stretch has left me frustrated as ever. even the boston pizza spicy thai chicken wrap sitting in front of me didn’t change my appetite or mood. i didn’t expect to have this talk with the flightclub crew, but i realize we’ve become close friends that i’m okay with letting them in on some of my thoughts and feelings, and they also shared theirs. lately, lots of negative thoughts were floating through my head, all of which left me empty. feeling discouraged with the training and progress as of late, i was beginning to accept my fate in my freestyle dream. i opened up and almost cried, but they listened and seemed to understand what i’m going through. maybe they finally realize the strong outer shell i uphold isn’t so strong on the inside

day 2153 – nintendo switch

a cozy night staying in playing nintendo switch and eating sushi. just a small get together to celebrate an ex-coworker’s birthday. also a good time to catch up and digress a little on the things that’s been happening around. after i got a few things off my chest, we changed the mood with some games. i rarely get to play video games, but it’s no surprise i got creamed in every game we played. we had good laughs all around and that’s all it matters

day 2073 – pearl fever

i happily holding onto my bubble reward for the twenty back tucks i was challenged to do. the perfect reward to end a frustrating and stressful week that made me want to walk out. i didn’t have any appetite even though i was hungry. i’m glad i didn’t go straight home and instead hung out with my friends to wind up the friday night. this would be my first milk tea from the highly touted pearl fever and it didn’t disappoint. the thirty percent sweet was perfect and just how i like it even though my friend who bought it didn’t think so

day 1568 – aburi aburiĀ 

img_20200203_1447521930418015068583459.jpga little aburi and sashimi is a good way to get through the hump of the week. it could be whatever day, but sushi almost never fails me. it’s the kind of comfort food that can lighten mood and get me back on my ways. there’s no change in my erratic sleeping patterns; no matter which day, i’ll wake up several times throughout the night thinking i missed my alarm. a large part is from stress, as i prepare myself for my big day ahead of me

day 1421 – solstice begins

img_20200124_1548121129728737801462007.jpgon days like this being stuck indoor away from windows isn’t ideal. the weather looks to be good for the rest of the week with the start of summer season. temperature is on the rise and it’s just one of the reasons summer is my favourite, for it brings sunshine to my life. all the fun summer activities awaits. maybe this will brighten my mood and bring me to a better place

day 1380 – the mopesĀ 

img_20200204_1554044286597922811444132.jpgthis is the time when i don’t want to have feelings because i only feel pain. it’s atypical for me to complain about pain and let the pain affect my life, but this is not normal when i can’t even move my head to look down or rotate my torso to get up. not quite sure what the hell is going on with my body besides life being hell right now. it’s frustrating me so much if affects the entirety of my life at the moment