day 1629 – design office 


the admins have finally moved out and we’ve taken ownership of the design studio. an afternoon of rearranging desk and then a morning setting up my workstation, it’s looking closer to having everything positioned perfectly. here’s where my ocd takes over; as i like my organized mess just the way it is. my pod isn’t in the best location but i can’t complain with my upgraded computer and inherited office’s biggest monitors

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day 1628 – stand

only ordered days ago and excited to find my laptop stand already at my doorstep. can’t wait to unwrap and put it to good use once i can set up my home workstation. it isn’t as sturdy as the site showed but it should do the job and carry the weight of my laptop. i’ve been very diligent with my spendings, and this is one i thought was timely with my situation

day 1627 – air

quite possibly the last sunshine for a long while because forecast is filled with rain. wasn’t a bad idea to be out getting some relaxing fresh air, especially after an uneasy night. realizing this is the time to figure out what everything means to me and what i’m worth to others. went through the day with no emotions and a big void inside. surprisingly didn’t even see a drop of tear; maybe tears went dry, or maybe i learn to block out my feelings

day 1626 – sandwich 


saturdays is barely considered meal prep. if lucky, i’ll get two toasts in; if not, one will get me through until dinner time. all these years i’ve managed killarney saturday classes as well as i could and no question i put my heart and soul into it. if sifu stopping by today changes because i taught wearing a t-shirt due to a broken thumb, i have nothing to say except it’s unfortunate. i can only say i do my best to not miss a shift, even when i’m in considerable pain

day 1625 – office revolution 


made it into the office today and good to know that i was missed. it’s made official the main renderer has resigned, leaving me as the only renderer. my manager told me i am the front runner to step up into the role and be the next one. i’m extremely excited for the opportunity presented because it’s what i wanted. i’m scared that the bigger responsibilities may expand multi-fold and must learn the new programs with no support. it’s daunting just thinking about it, but it’s within my power to take, learn and grow into being something much bigger. afterall, my manager has the confidence in me and said i’ll go as far as i’m willing to

day 1624 – gstrings girls

appointed photographer for dickens as photoweek for thursday continues. it forced me to see people and be sociable. it’s the only time i left the house cause i didn’t go into work yet again and it’s driving me up the wall. the swelling makes it uncomfortable to sleep at night, and can’t predict how the swelling will fluctuate throughout the day either. i feel useless that i can’t even take care of myself and don’t want to get out of bed to face the day

day 1623 – obyf oddities 

acting obyfs cause more than half of the originals were not present for photoweek. showing up to the gym not being able to play is a bad feeling, but i’m there for my teammates. i don’t know how long i’ll be in a cast and in reality how long i’ll be out, but the bigger question is how long i can handle myself before the negativity begins to be harmful to my health