day 2233 – flip talks

during the late night dinner with the crew, had a bit of a truth moment when the topic of competition came up. deep down i know i want to compete, but being removed from the competition field for quite some time is a big obstacle. i know for me to make a comeback, i put a lot of pressure on myself to only compete when i’m confident i can do well; i just want to ensure i’m at my best. but as of right now so many factors are standing in my way and instilling so many doubts. for one, my foot is a problem because it’s not letting me have my preferred techniques. i can’t work on my roundoff combos and i avoid kicking combos whenever possible

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day 2227 – taekwondo time

killarney just got a lot way more stressful starting this term. i’ll be short my vice instructor because she got pulled back to teaching at main branch but i get no one in return; it’ll be just me, an instructor and assistant instructors. i’ll have to train up another vice instructor from scratch. until then, i’ll have to own everything and be prepared to take on anything that comes my way. that’s including preparations for promotion tests, comeptitions and demonstrations while juggling my staff’s limited availability. it’ll be hard to stay sane throughout this term, but i’ll stay positive and continue to believe in what i can offer

day 2222 – fourth bound

after a full day at the dojo, i walked away with a fourth dan certificate. though i was satisfied with most, i was unhappy about one thing. i was bitter my x-out didn’t get the three attempts that all breakings get because he was worried i’d hurt myself. if held firmly, i was confident in breaking it. i’m still pretty proud i went for it considering the roller coaster i had been on the past few weeks. it was a good attempt and maybe the best attempt i had with boards. i’ll keep practicing and do it better one of these days for redemption. i’m just relieved this is all over. my beaten body full of gashes and bruises deserves the break after two long days at the dojo and of course all the work i’ve put into my x-out. definitely a smart decision to take tuesday as a flex day

day 2221 – dojo obliged

wasn’t too thrilled on working this quarter’s blackbelt test being well aware that i’ll be a long one. the test didn’t finish until 9:45pm and i walked out with many more cuts, scrapes and bruises from holding for all the board breaking misses. still, i headed to open gym without food because i said i would be there. i did some x-outs and reviewed some poomsaes before i called it a day. i couldn’t join the gang for late night food because i’ll need the energy for a full day ahead of me. this can’t be over soon enough; my soul needs a break

day 2217 – nothing left

i’m feeling upset and beat because it’s crunch time and i can’t seem to land anything, not even my basic back tuck. the test is in a matter of days and my x-out feels like it’s fallen apart. it’s not a required board breaking, but i have been yearning to do this and if i was only going to take the fourth dan test once in my life, i better make it be something i’ll remember. i wanted to be proud of what i did and not just do the bare minimum. at this rate, i’m not sure if it’s going to happen

day 2215 – sidekick break

did a high sidekick breaking just for fun. not bad for someone who hardly stretches and doesn’t put in the time to practice breaking anymore. probably haven’t kicked a board for real since my last test over four years ago. i need to do some last minute cramming for the boards that i’m about to break in a matter of days. i’m pressing for that x-out and hoping it is ready by then. aside from stick-knife and stick-stick self defense, i should probably review and shake off the rust for all the step sparring, self defense and poomsae

day 2214 – three musketeers

the killarney three musketeers made me a proud instructor today. they’ve grown into fine red-black belts. aside from these three, a lot of my students performed well and earned their stripes. they all worked very hard to pass my stage gate before they were allowed to test. first time i was given the pen to hand out promotion test marks. the grandmaster has spoken and basically informed me the date of my test – it’s coming up a lot sooner than i expected. i would’ve appreciated a longer notice. the pressure is on and i’m really starting to worry about my chosen breaking