day 1626 – sandwich 


saturdays is barely considered meal prep. if lucky, i’ll get two toasts in; if not, one will get me through until dinner time. all these years i’ve managed killarney saturday classes as well as i could and no question i put my heart and soul into it. if sifu stopping by today changes because i taught wearing a t-shirt due to a broken thumb, i have nothing to say except it’s unfortunate. i can only say i do my best to not miss a shift, even when i’m in considerable pain

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day 1597 – working slave


this fifty nine hour work week makes me i more like a working slave. i was pressured into taking an extra teaching shift that i was reluctant to take. i didn’t want to work a thirteen hour breakless shift on a friday but that’s what it came to be. sifu made me very uncomfortable with all the things he’s forcing upon me; he expects me to take the roles of school poomsae coach and the team bc poomsae coach which comes with added certifications i must first complete. thinking of the increased regular training and time commitment stresses me out, as if i don’t have enough on my plate already 

day 1548 – choice words


an angry parent came screaming in both mando and canto gave me all i could handle while sifu is away in asia. the more he raised his voice, the less i heard; he thought he could intimidate me, but even if i was, i couldn’t show any of it since i had to protect those below me. given the circumstances, i remained very calm and made sure he didn’t cross my line. i was startled being my first time dealing with such situation, but the fact that i held my ground made him back off. in the end i got some choice words for the angry parent that disrupted my class. one more step forward, and i probably would have called the police

day 1528 –  renovation complete 

it’s been a physically taxing day even compared to my typical saturday. put my muscles to good use early morning to move the fridge and the wall cabinets. a hectic five hour taekwondo shift of nonstop teaching without a water or washroom break. i felt depleted for the first hockey game and couldn’t get my mind nor my legs in the game. just as i thought i had no more gas in the tank for round two, i pulled through and managed to play some proper hockey. when i got off the ice, i then realized so many body parts are hurting

day 1484 – speak easy

nationals in the back of my mind the whole day made me so restless. i never expected the decision to be easy to overcome, and i think i handled it the best i could. what made it more difficult was i had no one to speak my mind and made it less inviting when i’m constantly being criticized, teased or ignored. i feel like i’m taking this on alone and less willing to pour my heart out knowing i’m going to get insults. i don’t know how long i can take the punishment

day 1322 – transformation 

this is not a throwback thursday, but a random photo sifu sent me today and i thought it was funny but fitting. to a raw competitor of six years ago, when i also sparred at bc champ. i can’t keep track of how many competitions i have been to since then; it’s probably a good sign when i don’t. i miss the good old days when i had coaches to turn to, but now i, myself, have taken on that role and can only rely. on myself. still trying to grow into someone i could rely on. it’s a special day for lomo, but no time to celebrate

day 1312 – team competitors 

competition day in portland came really quickly. i had low expectations going in because of what happened recently and the luck of poomsae draw didn’t help either. practice was sparse cause of the lack of time and the timing of injuries. i admit at times i didn’t try to make time to practice and even wanted to withdraw so i won’t disappoint anyone. i pulled together a gutsy performance today and took a gold and a satisfying bronze. i’m glad i was there to prove myself