day 1633 – muggy days


a whole week of wet and muggy weather further dampens my already bad mood at the moment. day fourteen of being in a splint and i can’t help but feel very depressed that i can’t do seemingly basic things. others just see me as being grumpy; it’s hard for anyone to understand what it means to me to be on the sideline missing out what i love doing. i’m doing everything to the best of my abilities, and that makes people forget how much pain and inconvenience i’m in. the countdown continues, but the thought of taking the risk is always on my mind

Advertisements

day 1632 – work selfie


plugging in the headphones at work to prevent too many distractions. people realize i’m not i’m the office for two days and feel the need to bother me. i have a lot of emails to catch up on and haven’t got the time to entertain people’s nonsense. i got really ticked off when someone came over to almost tease my minor sprain he called it. i went to bed without dinner since the stressful day took over my appetite. it’s not like i can exercise anyways so i might as well keep the eating off

day 1610 Рgrowlers 

i had no handle on what damages could happen today, but i have three appointments lined up. honestly think i make terrible decisions but i really wanted to play dodgeball after sitting out for an extra ten days. it’s taped up to the point where almost no skin on my hand is visible, yet it still hurts to grip the ball, catch the ball, throw the ball. i came out not thrilled expecting more, but at least playing today didn’t make it much worse

day 1506 – grandma’s arm

my grandma is over ninety but probably healthier than me even before i turned nineteen. rarely has she made my family worry, but today i received bad news that she broke her arm from a fall. i’m worried that she’s suffering in pain, that she can’t take care of herself, that she wants my father by her side. she needs to go through a procedure and what she needs most is care that i cannot provide her. i just can’t rest easy knowing what she is going through and can only wish i could take it for her

day 1471 – waking up

i am getting more irritated and more concerned waking up every morning feeling like a train hit me. i can’t move my neck to look down at the ground and cringe every time i need go bend over. these restrictions isn’t working for me and it’s only a matter of time before i explode. there’s so much i hate about my life at this point because it doesn’t allow me to move or play at will and i’m simply dying from gym withdrawal

day 1470 Рthe mopes 

this is the time when i don’t want to have feelings because i only feel pain. it’s atypical for me to complain about pain and let the pain affect my life, but this is not normal when i can’t even move my head to look down or rotate my torso to get up. not quite sure what the hell is going on with my body besides life being hell right now. it’s frustrating me so much if affects the entirety of my life at the moment

day 1434 – laying low

the work hours crept by so slowly but at least i was trying to work. at times i still felt dizzy with headache and wished that it wasn’t only wednesday. multiple body parts are wrecked and needs more rest than i will ever give it. surprisingly able to pry myself away from the gym and even decided against dodgeball. instead i spent the evening doing some overdue tedious calculations, paperwork and catchup