day 2331 – no headway

i carried around a heavy heart today because i’m not sure what my tricking future holds. today is technically the last class day of classes and i haven’t made any headway. i couldn’t say anything while i was with the gang, but i broke the moment i got home. for the first time, i spilled what my mind and body has been intending to do. it made me think back on all that’s happened and all that didn’t. it hurts me so much that it may have come to an end. all i could do is cry myself to sleep

day 2324 – reasons to quit

rough day doing flips today made me think of a lot of things that wasn’t suppose to cross my mind. i get the feeling others have already written me off and that i’ll no longer be able to land anything anymore. it’s unfair to be left hanging and it’s the main reason i’m considering quitting. i’m not a person that can settle with no foreseeable goals. in my mind, i’m thinking if i don’t land a new move either webster, butterfly twist, flash or flash gainer before the end of this year, i’m going to call it quits. maybe it’s better for everyone anyway so i’m not given false hope that i can be any good

resolution series: [twentynine] walk away

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you can say life is both long and short. how much you get out of it is entirely up to you because you are in the driver’s seat controlling the wheel and choosing your path. the shotgun may have inputs on which route to take and passengers may try to initiate backseat driving, but in the end, you are steering the wheel and that’s what matters most. somehow i find an amusement park resembles a person’s life at different stages of life. each day is very much like a ferris wheel; there’s a routine and certain tasks you must complete and once that cycles one round, you get up and do it all over again. and then there’s a roller coaster where it takes much time to build up and then go from absolute high to the uttermost low in a matter of seconds, or milliseconds. the hardest part of life is living a life doing things you hate doing. makes waking up every morning that much harder than it already is. it’s time i learn to step away from the things i dread doing and concentrate on striving for the things i like. maybe a change is in order to leave behind the load of what isn’t my responsibility and pursue what i am passionate about. in the end it is taking the good out of the grand scheme of things and making the most out of what you can, not what you are given. if you don’t like what are you doing, don’t follow blindly, walk away and choose your own destiny