day 1297 – where is it


not pleased that i just can’t find the determination i had when i was on top of my game. i’ve slipped far down and reality check startled me and no confidence took a big hit. i miss those days when i stayed focus on what i wanted. the hardest part is finding it and running with it. things will have to be different from here on because i can no longer tolerate my own  lapse

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resolution series: [twentysix] no control

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in the teens, very rarely if ever, have we had to worry about what happens beyond the current year. but once the twenties hits, everything starts to change and our minds start spinning faster than ever. so many questions begin to pop up, yet we seem to have no answer or solution to any of them. at this point in life there are so many uncertainties as to what one’s future holds. even though there may be ideas of where our interest lies and what our strengths and weaknesses are, but still tons of undetermined factors that has everything to do with our career paths and relationship statuses. being a person that loves to plan for schedules and have structured timelines, i strive to have concrete ideas and solid plans of what i will be doing and where i will be headed. i dislike ambiguity so i need to do my share of planning, so everything seems clearer than clear. to be honest, it really bugs me not knowing what the my future holds but there seems to be very little i can do about it at this point in time. sometimes i feel like i am a control freak on my own life, and i am slowly but surely learning to ease off and enjoy the moment at hand. i will just have to take it one step at a time and and wait for each step and each stage of life to unfold in front of me