day 2122 – iceland reykavik

first stop of my europe trip is a layover in iceland. twenty two hours to check into my airbnb and go for a crazy drive. made the trek out south to find the black sand beaches, caves and gigantic waterfalls. the most challenging part was trying to find things when all icelandic words are unprounceable. food there was so expensive even for the most basic and bland burger. i was so tired driving seven hours after a red eye flight, but had to suck it up and get back to the airbnb where my instant noodle awaits

day 1170 – tired brain

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some thoughts are really getting to me lately. it bugs me, but speaking my heart is hard. maybe i am just faulty or maybe i just need to suck it up and accept not being accepted. i try to not let these thoughts get in my head, but it’s only human. the storm is coming and i’m not looking forward to going outside; perhaps once this rainstorm is over, it’ll be over for me too

day 1041 – spartan everyday

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after having done my first ever spartan race on saturday, i feel like i could be a spartan everyday. i happily hit the gym on sunday, underestimating what my body had gone through. i only came to realization as i woke up this morning that my legs were jello. i could make excuses for myself, but mondays are never rest days for me – training must be done and dodgeball must go on. pushed myself really hard through a grueling training session today. my legs were no longer under me come dodgeball time, but i enjoy the feelings of pure exhaustion and these are the kind of things i want to be doing

day 604 – bashed legs

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my legs are bashed with countless bruises from everything as of late. i didn’t even realize how much damage was caused and what i did that may have caused it but it may or may not be a harmful thing. i guess its just another sign my pain receptors no longer feel its something that requires my attention. it’s probably preferable my legs don’t take any additional beating until the current ones subsides. i think my physio’s going to have a thing or two to say when he sees this

day 361 – just rolling

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my right knee has been clicking and uncomfortably pulling which means it’s time to roll out and release all the built up knots and kinks out of my legs. as painful as it will be, it’s necessary to getting all that tightness out and range of motion back. i expected to be badly bruised up after all that rolling but that’s nothing new, not like my leg isn’t already bruised up

day 338 – releasing knots

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tightness all around my legs to compensate for all the parts that aren’t doing its job. paying the price all at once with some painful rolling and massage for not having been keeping up with releasing all the muscles and stretching throughout this prolonged recovery process. everything is expectedly tight, must stop being lazy and start stretching again. being held down or pinned to avoid uncalled for kicking, not what i would call the normal massage

day 249 – after effect

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the after effect of using resistance band during my training session. guess i should have taken a look at it while i was doing it instead of continuing and ignoring the pain as if everything is okay. pain is a reoccuring theme in my life that it now feels normal, to the point where my pain sensors don’t even register that as pain. only i know exactly what’s going on inside my mind and body, no one else would ever understand the pain i go through and what goes on within so don’t act like you do