day 2509 – finger fractures

i still am not sure what is the extent of my injury, but the stubborn me is reluctant to take my finger into the hospital. i could probably go in and take xrays, but would confirmation really do anything for me? i’m almost certain whatever happens, the doctor will still tell me to lay off it for several weeks and monitor as needed. i found my old splint from my first ever finger fracture, it’s ghetto and bulky so i’m only going to wear it overnight

day 2328 – lifting norms

the first week i can weightlift freely more like a normal person would. i don’t feel bounded by the many external factors; not doing modified snatches not banned from cleans, not using straps and not wearing a splint. i also didn’t have a weight cap because coach allowed me to go as heavy as i feel comfortable. my body was ready and surprised me with strong lifts. i ended the session with a forty two kilo snatch and forty nine kilo clean and jerk. these numbers are very close to my max pre-injury. definitely the highs i haven’t felt for the past three months

day 2307 – finger splint

a splint on my finger is so suffocating and inconvenient. i hate how it’s so restrictive it is and how it prevents the swelling and bruising to dissipate. i get that i need to protect it when i’m out and around people, but whenever i’m by myself, i would try to remove it to let it air out. i know this is only week one, but hopefully i can get rid of this splint sooner than three weeks

day 2306 – finger fractured

checkininto burnaby hospital yet again. i’ve had far too many hospital and clinic visits in the past month. what i feared last night is confirmed by xrays. my middle finger needs to be splinted for a couple weeks. it’s been that kind of a month, not only does my foot not work properly, now my hand is also disabled. how can i not be disappointed one after the other, but i hope by staying positive, it can help with the recovery process

day 1574 – surgeon visit 

img_20200203_1446209065037156033478985.jpgfifth time into the clinic and fifth set of xrays, the radiologist has gotten to know me too well. hand specialist handed me some good news today that gave me a reason to smile and it wasn’t that my bone has grown back together cause the xrays are still ugly. in fact, he reiterates my bone will never be straight again, it will never appear as one piece, it may always have clicking inside, but he intends on making my thumb work again. my splint is trimmed down a little and i’m given the go ahead on certain things. it just means i now have less restrictions as to how often i need to wear it. the road is a little more clear now

day 1560 – scaled 

on my desk sits a scaled model that my dear coworkers said made them think of me. got a good laugh when coworker gave my model an upgraded splint, one that is tailored to document my hand healing progress. little things and acts of surprises like this makes my day go by smoother. there’ll be some that stick by to help during times of hardship; there’ll be those that won’t. that’s when i learn what kind of person they are what who truly cares

day 1553 – splint change 

third time into hand clinic and fourth set of xrays taken within twenty four days. new specialist has taken over my case and i’m still confused with how i’ll be treated. he wasted no time; i get a new splint made right away and hand therapy begins. she assigned four exercises which i had plenty of trouble doing on my first set. i’m instructed these were to be done minimum five times a day. by the end of the day i made much improvement with two of them, but still struggling with the other two. these are very basic motor skills that i’ve lost made me feel useless. i can only hope that if i keep at it, it will get better day by day

day 1545 – shrinking fast

i was so curious to see what was going on underneath the tensor band and fiberglass. the doctor at checkup reminded me to be a good patient; clearly, he had a good reason to remind me. thinking it’s okay to unwrap it for a couple hours while i’m working from home. it’s unhealthy skin tone with wrinkly dead skin was an unpleasant sight. after not using it for over just two weeks, my left wrist is shrinking big time. i am very worried that after my six weeks is up, there will be nothing left in my arm and i won’t have any muscles left

day 1541 – recasted

i was anxious to see my referred hand specialist also known as cosmetic plastic surgeon. i saw my bruised and shriveled up hand as he removed my splint to take a new set of xrays. after flipping back and forth a dozen times and examining my bone, he decided he wasn’t satisfied and wanted to reexamine next week. he sent me home recasted with a fiberglass splint only to do it all over again to decide if i require surgery or not. the splint is slightly less bulky, but just as uncomfortable. i pray for it to meld back together quickly so i can get back to doing what i do

day 1529 – shattered thumb 

a blocked shot did all the damage. took it directly off my thumb and immediately knew it was broken but kept playing since no one was on site to confirm that. i couldn’t put my bottom hand on the stick, but i played on and eventually put one into the net. although netting the goal should not be my main focus now, it was definitely the saving grace of the game ending injury. i tend to downplay the pain hoping the injury isn’t as bad as it feels. two hospitals and four hours later, the hand specialist decided i can have a splint without immediate surgery. the night ended in a few disappointment, the length of time i’ll be out, and care and support that was present