day 1285 – badbell hog

it seems everyone is busy with super bowl sunday so there’s no meatheads to be seen. i had the whole cage to myself so i carried out my work using a pair of barbells. i decided my big weights for leg must go on after power skating, so even though skating session today was a tougher one than all previous times, i couldn’t change my mind. i knew i made a mistake of deciding to go straight into that workout, but i don’t regret one bit of having completed it as planned. it was heavy on my shoulders and my legs still feel the burn as i lay in bed, but the fact i pushed through is satisfying 

rise and shine

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vacation is officially over. that means it’s time to get back on track and grind again. during the twelve day span that i was overseas, i felt so confined and struggled mightily with gym withdrawal. the days felt so unfulfilling without any real physical exertion. i would hate to live like this on a normal basis. i was dying inside but my parents didn’t understand why i was making a big fuss out of it because they simply didn’t understand what gym and sports meant to me. i, on the other hand, have no intention of explaining it to them. some days they would make random comments relating to my built in hopes to convince me to lessen my exertion. luckily venting to mo has eased much of my frustration; i know he’s well aware of where i’m coming from. back home, training and being active is a major part of my life. i’ve been consistently training and making progress on many levels and i felt good about them. but a dozen days without gym access has set me back really far and now i’m uncertain what i’m capable of. i am actually afraid to find out. i would feel so useless if i find out i’m back at square one. i don’t want to lose what i have worked hard for. i told myself that once this vacation is over, everything will go back to normal – no, it’s going to be even better. i told myself i would rep out all my sets; i wouldn’t be lazy, complain or make excuses. somehow, i need to keep myself accountable and get myself back on track if i stray. i am back in town today, which means i’ll be hitting the gym doing what i need to be doing. the destination is pretty clear, my mind just needs to work with me. it’ll be a long road back, but i must refocus and work harder to negate that deficit. june is a month of many changes and challenges; one that i am going to make things happen. it will be worth it in the end

day 905 – my setup

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after the first round, i felt like i was going to die and making it out of the gym alive was questionable. i thought to myself that stopping after round one would be a huge letdown and wouldn’t be a good representation of what i am truly capable of. i kept chugging on one exercise to the next, hoping to at least finish with a respectable amount before i call it quits. i am truly amazed at what i accomplished today. not only did i finish all rounds of all exercises, but i am able to walk out of this gym feeling good about what i willed myself to do. i would say my first go of my modified workout went well. i’m totally okay with having sore legs and not being able to walk tomorrow

day 901 – plyo power

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i knew what i was in for the moment i stepped into the gym today. it was all about drilling and drilling plyos because that’s what i wanted so that’s exactly what i got. the buckets of sweat from today said it all. it’s a very fulfilling and satisfying session cause i felt like i gave it my all and made every rep count. there was no holding back nor conserving energy for next sets on this day. this should be my hardest working session yet where all breaks received were hard earned

day 876 – eve workout

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spending morning of my christmas eve at the gym banging out the reps because scheduled work never stops. it was a workout i needed to get in because it put me at ease and made me feel right. i felt particularly bad i lost track of time yesterday and didn’t make it into the gym like originally intended. a tiring session as usual and i’m exhausted leaving the gym, but it was definitely the energizer that sparks the rest of the day

day 871 – lift a little

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soreness amassed from this week’s training and physio exercises shouldn’t stop me from my scheduled workout. i went to the gym as planned and was prepared to struggle mighty hard. as i had the weight on my back, i thought the bar felt extra heavy today. it was difficult, but somehow forced myself to finish it and walked off still intact. i was randomly thinking back on my squats this evening, and suddenly realized the weight i had mounted on my bar exceeded what i thought i had. i felt dumbfounded i hadn’t realized it at that time, but pleased that i had done it anyway. it goes to show that the mind likes to play number games and sometimes ignorance is a good test for the body

day 840 – finish my set

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lights are out at the gym and i am the last one in there still trying to finish my set before the door closes. i struggled through every rep of every set, but i completed it all and made it count. the increased set and intensified circuit got me real good but i deserved it and didn’t dare think twice about complaining or skipping out reps. i know i am going to be sore tomorrow and i also have more training tomorrow, but i will take it like a champ. it’s a good kind of sore knowing i did the right thing

mental game

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bad habits always gets me. every time i feel like i am in exhaustion, i will stop short of completion and make myself believe enough is enough. i have just come to accept the fact that my mental game is not as strong as it needs to be, and that there’s nothing i can do to improve that aspect. this shortcoming is probably an explanation as to why my game has remained stagnant over the years, where i stop short and fail to take my game to the next level. and this only becomes a cyclical process where when i don’t perform well, i tend to hang my head but not focus on finding the underlying problems and dealing with it head on. just today i was reminded that my body is stronger than i think and when fatigue sets in, the mind is usually the first to give in. so when training in and out of the gym, or anywhere for that matter, it is as much training for my mentality as it is for my physicality. it is good that i get to work alongside some of the most motivational individuals because reality is i need constant reminder that i must stop at nothing until i push out the last rep of the last set. the kind of people that are never satisfied and always challenging me to be better and only then will i come to the realization that i can do things i thought i never could. these individuals keep me honest and lets me know that i ain’t going anywhere until i complete it cause anything below my maximum capability is unacceptable.  i think my recent knee ligament that made me forgo my november competition really caused the damage – in a good way. there’s been a recent spark in me that i want it more than ever before; that i am willing to work hard for what i want to achieve and i am going to tackle my weaknesses head on. i no longer want my game to remain the same. i have some ambitious goals to reach and it certainly wouldn’t reach itself. i am ready to take that next step in further enhancing my game, and i am determined to do whatever it takes. the power is in me and it is up to me to train it to work to live up to my fullest potential. i do believe it is in me

day 763 – getting sweaty

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despite bouts of headaches and some sort of unknown illness, i was determined to start september on the right foot; the first of september means first of september. august had its ups and downs, but many things are about to change and things are really going to take off in september, i won’t let it slip away without getting what i want. in the meantime, keep grinding even when times are tough

day 758 – physio checkup

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having my regular morning physio check up and it was a positive one, held up nicely since last visit and that’s huge for me. it’s a sign of progress and a big step in the right direction considering i have been doing a fair amount of my activities during this time span. my reward for having such positive feedback is some trolling courtesy of my physio and kinesiologist who demanded some unexpected numbers and then threw a curveball at me. i had a lot of hesitation but they gave me the sense there was no way out of it knowing i must do it or i am not going home