day 1130 – hockey practice

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the morning started off good gearing up for a practice with teammates before the regular season. i was thrilled to be on ice with gear, sticks and pucks but that was the only bright spot. somethings got in the way but it was a setting i had to keep my composure and pretend nothing was wrong. i spoke my exact feelings and thoughts, but the thorn is way deeper than what i can remove. it was an unsettling feeling that started off sour and ended sour; made it far from an enjoyable rest of the night. i needed a punching bag more than anything and deep down i had the urge to go get one

day 1079 – partner in crime

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there were uncalled emotional moments which i couldn’t suppress. tears happened because i have been pretending to be strong for too long. i can count on him knowing he wants to be there during my worst and toughest moments. it has been very tough lately, but i know it’s much easier to weather the storm together. happy for the passing of another month; keeping it strong and keeping it real throughout

day 716 – take me back

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take me back home to where i belong. where the night meets the day seamlessly and not much could get in the way of me and my dreams. when i thought i had friends that would last forever and get me through tough times. what i dreamt i would accomplish and make a difference in this world. who i thought i would become to be strong enough to withstand. how i thought i would live my life, standing affront the beach and gazing out at sunset

day 505 – drained

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feeling awfully drained and really needing a break. no doubt i knew there would come a time when my mind and body will not allow me to continue with the kind of schedule i run on. its been wearing down on me for over half a year and now my mind is ready to go on strike. i wake up everyday feeling crappy and even more so exhausted knowing the things i have to get through day after day. all i want to do is shut off the world and finish what i have to do. it’s christmas season and all i am too drained to even enjoy it. i try to hide all that stress and pretend everything is okay because i don’t want to put it upon anyone else but somehow it’s showing through my shell. i need a break, i know its not time yet, but i know it’s coming in a couple more weeks