this is my second christmas potluck with hd and i’d say i enjoyed this one a lot more than the last. this year, acquaintances became friends and friends became good friends. i set out to accomplish a lot at work this calendar year and certainly i did it. i received year end thank you cards with from the words of my manager and big boss – amazing what you’ve accomplished this year! i made majority of my deadlines in the overworked months, and my break is definitely earned. there’s a lot more in store for me when i return, but for now my job is to recuperate and get ready to rock it in the new year. everyone’s waiting and watching on my comeback year
the start of saturday morning shifts has begun so i’ll be working nine straight hours on saturdays between two jobs. i wonder how long i will last with sixty four hour work weeks before i burn out. i was tired after the two shifts but doesn’t change my plans for an impromptu karaoke and board games night. i had a good night chilling with peeps. it was the fun i used to have; the good company kept from thinking why i’m still feeling solo all the time. it’s not a good feeling to always never have the support of the closest ones. i miss the times when i could be out way past midnight and actually have a night life
i had a lot of trouble sleeping tonight. what makes me such a good victim for people to hurt and take advantage of. i guess my feelings can be swept aside, guess promises can be broken, guess what i like or don’t like doesn’t matter anyways. at first i didn’t think i was fat but being repeatedly called that makes me believe i am indeed fat and repeatedly makes me skip meals. even after long days i force myself through the fatigue to come here simply cause i can’t eat unless i exercise. today is one of those days where i’m feeling completely burned out from a fifty eight hour work week but still dragged myself to workout because my dinner is not yet earned
fitbit shows me i need to put myself higher on the priority list and sleep a little more. sadly the amount i worked this week doubled the amount of sleep i got. i never really got a break and the start of another work week is in just a few hours away. i’m not looking forward to next week working all seven days. i am not always guaranteed a weekend, but at least this week i still have sunday off as a small breather
as a treat for finishing my semester, i am delivered a sushi dinner. i was majorly stressed and overworked leading up to this day, but i am relieved of my duties of and sharing my happiness together. i haven’t had time to even sit at my desk chir much so i am really looking forward to going back to some routines. on the top of my priorities is sleep and a long, long to do list to catch up with
some thoughts are really getting to me lately. it bugs me, but speaking my heart is hard. maybe i am just faulty or maybe i just need to suck it up and accept not being accepted. i try to not let these thoughts get in my head, but it’s only human. the storm is coming and i’m not looking forward to going outside; perhaps once this rainstorm is over, it’ll be over for me too
when is it my turn to take a real vacation to get away from this hectic life?? i have taken time off, i have flown and driven and gone across canada, but none of which was purely for vacation because i held competition obligations. i am drained, overworked and am in dire need of a vacation where i can just relax and get away from stresses of life no matter how big or small. there’s too many places, cities and countries on my wishlist; when and where will i be able to fulfill them??