day 1937 – grand opening

was there to attend the grand opening of my cousin’s chocolate shop. it wasn’t very interesting because i didn’t even know three quarters of the people that attended. i really had no reason to stay there after the official ceremony, but i guess my mom had to do her socializing. i find that sometimes she takes on too much and becomes more of a counselor, mentor and psychologist for everyone around her. not everyone will appreciate her keen sense of friendliness

day 1575 – long talks

being filled in the world of politics over some sushi to get the latest news. i have a better picture of what’s going on the the political world but that doesn’t change the position i’m in. after this talk, it reassures me the approach i’ve been taking is the correct one. it helps to know these things; i take these advice with a grain of salt and will give it some careful thoughts in the next little while

day 1570 – ikea run

treated to ikea froyo for helping with the ikea run. haven’t been to ikea for some time and haven’t eaten anything from ikea in a long time. as much as i wanted to reject the extra calories knowing pubnight social food is in the evening, it was already bought for me. so much guilt as i hold onto this cone wondering what after effects it may have. i restrict myself to a deficit on a regular basis, so one day i will lose the fat name callings. until then, i’ll always be self conscious and not let myself always have what it craves

diminishing return

img_20200204_1832142982780415946048256.jpgi take pride in what i’m capable of and the steps towards progression. i get that not everyone will appreciate accomplishments the same way. i’ve been on the receiving end of far too many discrediting comments that has no sentimental value. it would be nice to pay respect for my abilities when due instead of always heaving knit picky deconstructive criticism. leave it behind if it’s all negativity with no good intent; just don’t expect any in return. i’ve been disappointed that communication has been sparse and lacking lately. understanding the busy schedule that we run, there’s no reason to have no contact or replies until well after the fact. i no longer want to force anything so i’ll respond when i’m asked, otherwise i’ll stay behind the scenes and mind my own business. it’s kind of taken some of the joy out, but at least i’m not talking to myself. these are the little things that show a lot. life is a two way street and i’m a true believer in what you give is what you get in return. my patience isn’t unlimited so i won’t continually give knowing there’s nothing in the other direction

day 902 – blackberry

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thought i would get away from my regular flavours and try some new flavours this time. blackberry was a bad choice, i didn’t expect it to taste horrible but i guess i didn’t know what to expect. i hope the other flavours in this batch taste better. feeling strange today, almost a little down for no particular reason, i skipped out on my original evening plans and just went to the gym instead

Aga – 一加一

she has a pretty good list of songs that’s worthy of staying on my car music album. i like this song but i don’t even know why. just something that i would like to listen to in the car and wouldn’t get tired of it even when it’s on repeat. i guess one plus one does equal two and that there’s possibility out of every seed you plant. everything you see is all about perspective

day 757 – love this sport

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my body is tired and still recovering from the long trek but nothing is going to stop me from enjoying the pleasures of tennis – the love of my life. if the opportunity presents itself, i don’t need a reason to be here playing this sport. my arms felt extra heavy and still feeling rusty but i still had a great time hitting the hardcourt. need more days like this to fill my life with much more tennis

resolution series: [twentyfour] bad habits

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it’s one of those unexplained phenomena why most girls always take pictures of their food before devouring them. i guess for me i like to document things and have variety of pictures available for blogging. i don’t know how to stop having food cravings at the most random times. one thing on my to do list is to limit the amount of eating out and consumption of unnecessary crap because it is hard to control my digestive system. and speaking of digestive system, there’s been some ongoing issues with mine that i have yet to find reason or solution to, all i know is it is very sensitive and gets upset for no good reason. also wish that i could get rid of that peculiar food craving and stop eating junk at the most inopportune times. i have this terrible habit like the sudden urge to have chocolate, ice cream, cookies, chips and all sorts of unhealthy snacks you can possibly think of. fortunately i am not a big fan of desserts, especially the white desserts and pastries like cupcakes, brownies, mousse cakes etc, but i do like my fair share of asian snacks. with all that said, my top priority is cleaning up my eating, control my cravings and intake to ensure that i do not mess up my already messed up digestive system. maybe once that gets under control, then i can pinpoint what is going on with my stomach

day 472 – bruise lots

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feels like i am bruising by the minute and i just can’t stop it from accumulating. this is just a portion of the eleven bruises on my legs, there’s also several on my arms and back. i must have done something sometime when i clearly had no awareness. also banged up my wrist big time it’s completely out of commission to hold or do anything. better fix some of this soon or will be a shocker when my parents return

day 387 – dysfunctional

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my uncooperative legs have been preventing me from carrying out my regular routines. currently on the mend with my finger crossed whatever that’s bothering me is not too serious like the original diagnosis because i hate being benched and watching from the sideline. i hate it when it interferes with my routines and no one understands how i feel how hopeless and desperate i feel