resolution series: [twentyeight] pity

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everyone has their own problems to deal with, some less complex than others. there’s no secret that i have been plagued with endless injuries throughout my life. i have given up on trying to hide that, because i have learned that patchwork only makes it go away on the superficial level. unfortunately that’s just temporary fix and will keep piling on to account for greater problems. i simply cannot live without the sports and activities which i play, for it is the passion of my life. it won’t be forever, but it is my choice to continue playing and practicing them for as long as i can manage. i do intend on doing everything i can within my powers to do my rehab and maintenance work. my main focus is on getting better and stronger every single day; always be a better version of myself. don’t question my will to strive for what i want just because you have it easier. don’t question my passion to always stay hungry and carry on even when nothing goes my way. don’t question how big my heart is when you don’t know how much pain i have endured. don’t question my toughness if you don’t know what i experienced because very few people have a clue how much work, time, energy and commitment i put into making all this possible. standing on my own two feet was never a given to me, but i learn to be grateful for all the times i can. sometimes i sit alone thinking to myself i don’t deserve to be dealing with all these mishaps and i certainly don’t deserve your bashing or judgement. i need not your pity nor your approval for what i have to go through as i result of what i do. i was given this life and these obstacles because i could handle it. i appreciate those who’s helped me out along the way, it’s meant the world to me. if you have nothing good to say, don’t speak

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resolution series: [twentytwo] mentor

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the people i have been surrounded by have played a tremendous role in shaping me for who i am. they provided me with much guidance, endless advice and mentorship that influenced my growth as a human being. i have had many people guiding and pushing me every step of the way, either dragging me back on track whenever i stray away or making sure i don’t slack off when i shouldn’t be. i know for a fact, without the team behind the scenes attending to me when i fall apart, i probably wouldn’t be walking today. they have constantly given me motivations to train harder and train smarter to get better and get stronger. it is through them i learned that i must put in the work and work for what i want in order to continue playing the sports of my life. the coaches and teammates i’ve had the privilege of playing with and learning from also played a significant role. they have taught me the true meaning of teamwork, that we ought to work hard for each other. lots of credit goes to the instructors that inspired me and showed me to way to higher ground. i have come a long way from the beginning of my taekwondo journey, but i won’t stop knowing there’s still a long way to go to get to a level i never imagined i could be at. i am hoping one day i would be looked up upon, to be mentoring and inspiring others to become what they could never have imagined

 

resolution series: [twenty] happy

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people can be too judgmental and materialistic these days. yes it’s true, you can’t live without money, but you can’t live with happiness either; and the last time i checked, money can’t buy happiness. sometimes it is the little things in life that makes all the difference in the world.  even as simple as an act of kindness can go a long with in someone else’s life. the ultimate goal is living a happy life and getting what you want out of life. be who you are and don’t let anything change you. do the things you like and don’t let other people tell you otherwise. it’s your life after all, so it’s better to live the way you want than to have someone tell you how to live your life. there used to be so many negative people in my life that always told me what i couldn’t do and what not do to. that’s more reason to prove them wrong and make sure they don’t make such assumptions again. i like my sports and activities. i am also aware that i am made of glass and gets injured easily, but that doesn’t stop me cause that’s what makes me. through sports i find happiness; its my happy place whenever i need to destress or digress. also enjoy hanging out and chilling with my friends, trying new things, eat out, traveling, exploring the city and the world. these things make up me and i can’t imagine my life without them. i will continue to pursue my dreams and passion for as long as i can

resolution series: [four] passion

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twenties is often said to be prime time. it’s important time to figure out what you love and where your passion is at. if you don’t enjoy what you are doing, probably means it is time to rethink and explore your options. life is too short to dwell on what you must do on a daily basis, makes getting up every morning that much harder. it might be scary to realize you no longer love what you are currently doing, but it is better than realizing that now than in the next decade of your life. it may look like i knew what i wanted and where i was headed all along, but that’s not the case. it started off that way, but things change over time and sometimes the path may not be what you expected it to be. there are things i am certain about but there’s also a few things i have yet to figure out. i have a lot of self doubts and there’s no question i am afraid of failing to achieve what i set out to do, but it’s something i am working on. slowly but surely, i am beginning to find all the pieces to what i consider happiness. i like to travel, i like to eat, i like my gadget, i like the people i am surrounded by, and there’s no better place to live and do all that other than vancouver. i couldn’t be more certain about my passion and love for sports. being active is something i pride upon and definitely cannot live without. so no matter how many times i get injured or break myself, it doesn’t stop me from getting back at it even if everyone doesn’t agree with me. no matter what you do, do it with passion. life is a long journey, so make it worthwhile

resolution series: [one] finish

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life presents many unexpected circumstances that act as distractions away from our intended goals. with so much going on in our daily lives, it’s easy to lose sight of what we need to focus on and follow through with. i always need to be reminded to finish whatever i started because i have the tendency of always wanting to give up when things get hard, particularly for things that i am not good at. i have been on the receiving end of many wake up calls and lectures that i must stop avoiding my weaknesses and in turn confront them head on. some things just came to me naturally; i need not to put much effort in to succeed. i have little problem following through with what i excel at but that cannot be said for things that didn’t come naturally. i excelled in swimming at a young age and swimming was my life. but when life got busy, i quit just short of getting my lifeguard certification and it still haunts me to this day. taekwondo came naturally early on but since i am so injury plagued, countless people tried to make me stop. but no matter how many times i fell and how many challenges and injuries i faced, i got back up and did what i needed to do. i wanted to prove everyone wrong and more importantly, i wanted to do this for myself and make up for my past regrets. running was never my thing as i found it boring and tiresome but i put in the effort to make improvements in this area. since i began taking rehab and strengthening exercises seriously, i have made leaps and bounds in my ability and recovery but there’s still a long way to go to get to where i want to be. so this year, i want to make my best effort to work on all those weaknesses and train it to become my strength. i know i cannot always carry self doubt with me everywhere, i just go out and make it happen

day 619 – tkd marathon

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just got home from friday night training and will be back for saturday morning poomsae training in roughly six hours. i might as well have a sleep over there to get myself more snooze time because i am schedule to train, teach, then train again for a combined ten hours on the mats.i didn’t even bother bringing my uniform and belt home because i will be back in gear in no time

take no excuses

image my leg was burning and could not muster another rep so i turned to my kinesiologist and said i am exhausted. he in turn stared at me with little compassion and told me i must tank it and keep going no matter what my body feels. every now and then, he would look over to check on me and tell me not to slack off because he knows me far too well. over the many years, the kins that worked with me knows exactly what i do to get out of doing things i consider difficult. i guess i have developed a slacker reputation and one that will stick with me for as long as i live. they no longer concede to any of my excuses or complaints because know that i give up too easily and only stay within my comfort zone. in other words, unless i puke, faint or die on the spot, i must keep going because he isn’t decreasing the reps or weight. and in at the end i survived it all and knew i had done something right for once. he told me he believed i was strong enough and forced me to find a way to tough it out, all i needed was a push. i’ll take that compliment with me and think about it at home. he also said that training is meant to be hard so to push me to my limit because it’s all about overcoming weaknesses. if the training was easy, i would be cheating myself. thankfully he hadn’t conceded to my whining otherwise i would have taken the easy way out for the two hundred thousandths time