it was new years day and i just wanted to be home so i could be antisocial. being rattled and feeling unworthy in so many ways. my disappointment and discomfort loomed over, i didn’t even make it into the gym. instead, i rang in the new year with all sorts of organizational work and kept myself as busy as possible. i worked like a robot and had a productive day, but i didn’t feel much satisfaction. i spent the night spilling my thoughts on the keyboard to erase today and start again tomorrow
my parents taking me out for dinner on one of the rare days i have a sit down meal with them. it’s important i let them have a piece of my mind; at least now they have an idea of what’s going through my head. they took my opinions and thoughts relatively well. even though it seems like nothing is resolved, i do feel relieved to let it out. i no longer want to be carrying this rock on my shoulders because it’s a neverending burden
today is mainly a transit day with bus rides and plane rides. on my way to japan, but first, a short layover in taiwan. i managed to squeeze in short face time chats at the airport. i landed in osaka slightly past 7:30pm and didn’t get to my b&b until well past 9:30pm so my japan adventures will begin tomorrow
this concludes the hong kong portion of my trip. i had an enjoyable time getting to see all the family in my birth place. i can’t complain about the scheduling because i was able to fit in all the friends i wanted to catch up with. it’s always hard to say goodbye, especially to my ageing grandmas. although i don’t get to physically spend time with my grandparents, we do make frequent calls to keep in touch
i had one of those emotional day last night where i wasn’t quite my composed self. i really shouldn’t have mentioned it to mo because it makes no sense for him to worry about me halfway across the globe. i think i gave him a scare but i’m much more relieved and lighter after talking it over with mo
tonight is the closest it will get to being a perfect night where i feel unbelievably good accomplishing exactly what i wanted to do. i was under a lot of stress and breaking a sweat at the gym was the solution cause i walked out satisfyingly exhausting, but also reenergized. after i got it out of my system, i was able to focus and work away without realizing the time. staying up late is what i was regularly harped at because i do it much too often, but at least it’s for a good cause
