day 2092 – second cup

most days i get by with one cup, but today i went for seconds. i’m feeling antsy and not at the same time because i have a deadline i know i won’t be able to make. there’s nothing i can do if all the remote computers are having sketchup vray license is having issues. i’m ticked off at home because my dad is throwing a hissy fit over something that sounds so minor. i’m just going to do my part and support my mom when necessary

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day 1548 – hand specialist 


i know my way around the clinic the second time around and the same radiologist helped me take another batch of xrays. the bad news couldn’t get any worse each batch as the ones taken today shows my bone is now displaced and not in the right place. with that, the specialist decided surgery will take place tomorrow and i’ll be opened to do one of the two possible procedures. the news hit me hard, so stunned i wasn’t able to collect any of my emotions to react or think. the rest of the day was a blur because i felt completely empty inside with no feelings, no appetite, no motivation and none of anything. i beared all that burden alone as if i’ve always been alone from the start. i finally cried well into the evening and i’m glad i did; i found out at least i have emotions. i’m not scared of the procedure, but the thought of having something inserted in me makes me not me

day 1303 – gstring 

just as we expected, we were bumped up to tier 2 after the retier. we’ll most likely stick in this tier for the remainder of the season so these are good matchups come playoffs. i was suppose to ease up for my legs’ sake but somehow ended up falling over a bench mid game. photoweek got more interesting when gstrings showed up with our lingerie. i was really bothered by some issues were brought to my attention at the end of the day and that kept my up at night 

30 share it [fifteen]

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one of the least pleasant way to start my day. woke up this morning with a scare and really didn’t know what to think of it, even turned to google for possibilities. hoping to outlast it as long as i can bear it, else i need to get to the bottom of this issue. today is not one of my good days for sure. i’m not in the mood to do anything tonight so i guess i’ll go and sleep it off

day 552 – vmo

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no secret what is the underlying issue that i try to slip through under the radar all these years. i knew it was only a matter of time until muscle imbalance catches up to me. today, physio finally forced it upon me to work my vmo using the muscle stimulator and i am already not fond of that device. both kinesiologist and physio flat out said it’s a tortuous process where the machine would cause a lot of painful contractions but said that i am forced to do it for as long as it needs to catch up. its a brutal process, but it must be done because he’s not going to let me off the hook anymore

twenties series: [fifteen] issues

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after living for twenty years, you ought to know that life is full of challenges similar to a game of baseball that will throw fast balls, knuckle balls and curve balls whenever you least expect it. learn that no matter how many times you fail and how hard you fall, you just have to get up off your butt and attempt again. i have learned that i am not flawless and there are many things that needs improvement, but i am willing to make the changes required to be the person i want to become. still working on getting rid of all negative vibe and set a good examples for the younger ones i take under my wings. in the end, my ultimate goal is to be a positive influence to the people around me and leave a lasting finger print on their lives in some form. i will set my mind on doing what i want to achieve and prove all those doubters who once said there are things i cannot do. remember to always keep your eye on the ball, your head in the games and everything else will take care of itself. no one is born perfect, no one will ever come close to being perfect but those who try to be who they are will be the happiest. in other words, just be who you are and everything else will take care of itself

 

…and that wraps up my twenties series. hope you enjoyed reading up on what my thoughts are as much as i enjoyed writing them. hope to do more series soon