singapore 2018

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the seventeen-day hong kong and singapore trip was pretty good but also came with some hard realization. it was an eventful two and a half weeks full of relatives, eating, walking, relaxing, chilling and exercising. with my parents, we explored the many places of singapore with exceptional architecture and delicious foods. i thought i would gain a lot of weight being in asia with endless eating, but that was not the case since i kept my exercise level up. i met up with old friends who took me on a wild tour to see the ins and outs of what hong kong is about. the main purpose of this trip was to visit my two grandmas. they are getting up there in age and it’s important for me to see them as often as time permits. spending time with them during this trip made me learn the brutal reality of health and aging. both of them had their mobility restrictions. my heart felt sour knowing i can’t help them out of this brutality even with the vast amount of experience, knowledge and education. all i can do is be by their side and spend time with them. with that said, i could see my grandmas’ face glow when i take them out for lunch, or even simply pay them an afternoon visit. regardless of what was said, it was good to spend time traveling with my parents; i don’t get that much anymore. that’s a wrap for my 2018 asia trip. i’ll be back soon enough

day 1370 – handling business

the scope of work i do is often done behind the scenes and not always seen, but i take pride in what i do and doing my job well. my manager shared something with me today that i never expected. apparently my coworkers have been impressed with the way i’ve handled myself and quietly gone about my business. it’s great to be singled out and appreciated for what i do. i think i’m holding myself fine and i’m more than happy to step it up when opportunity arises

day 964 – soup

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found a note and a big bowl of homemade soup on the kitchen counter courtesy of mom. i haven’t been home for meals much lately so i have been missing out on all her homecooking and healthy soups. she’s always concerned i am not eating enough and not getting nutritious meals in. i guess in a way she has all the reason to do so because in her eyes, i never seem to eat enough

fight for it

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very, very late last night, i finally gathered the courage and came to a tough decision to pass up on this year’s us open. this may be a rare opportunity in my lifetime to partake in such a massive event of exceptional calibre. i never ever in my life imagined myself being granted this opportunity but maybe because of that, it instilled so much fear in me. it would have been a superb experience, but not one that i felt i was ready to take on alone. i didn’t feel like my physical capabilities nor my mental game was ready for this level of competition. i can’t deny i am very disappointed i choose to back out of these opens because it’s something i’ve been really looking forward to for months and months. sometimes i think i would hate myself for letting this chance slip away, but it’s a decision i made and one that i will be able to live with. i know that this decision was as tough on me as it was for those who devoted so much time and energy in me – with their heart and soul and giving me only positive encouragements. there’s several individuals i want to single out for they were always around to listen to all my rants, troubles and everything in between. but none more so than the hardass nazi who never stopped believing in me, who listened to my many insecurities and tried to put everything into perspective in order to will me to take the challenge. i can’t express my gratitude for all the support i have received along the way. i am sorry i couldn’t make this happen, i wished i could find the inner strength. i may seem down and out at the moment, but with time i will recuperate and bounce back stronger than before. i haven’t lost my passion for competing, it’s simply a little setback that i must overcome. moving forward, i will work extra hard to better prepare myself for nationals. it’s going to happen

day 872 – student love

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receiving this gift and card really brightened my day. even though i didn’t have any of the chocolate, i felt the sweetness, the love and the warmth inside. this gift is yet another testament to the dividends of what i put in towards coaching and teaching. i don’t need no returns to do what i do, but it sure means a lot to me when students understand and appreciate what they must put in to achieve what they achieve. it is what i do day in and day out that pays off

day 839 – not right

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i had a great weekend, only up to the moment i realize i had disobeyed all that i said i would do. i am fighting myself and feeling torn inside because i walked in with a number in mind but went well beyond that limit, i don’t know how it got so out of hand. it’s only finally hitting me hard today, the wheels have really fallen off and i don’t even know where to begin to pick myself up. what a heart felt disappointment when i have regretfully misused the trust others had in me. i failed others and most importantly i have failed myself. need to learn that discipline is choosing between what i want now and what i want most. perhaps i must be stricter and harder on myself and start my climb from the bottom again. i guess i deserved to have both my pinkies sprained during practice

day 829 – gift of goodness

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today i received a gift of goodness in a warm red cup. at first i was a little puzzled cause i didn’t know why. afterwards she told me she really appreciates all the help and wanted to thank me for the work i did. what i did was no big deal because i only do what i can whenever i can. it was a very nice gesture that filled my heart and made my day. this kind of action is a reminder to never overlook the act of kindness and any kind of acknowledgement. it’s the little things that adds up to mean a lot. i, for one, felt it today