day 1621 – big lifts


had an extremely late night but woke up early with a few things in mind. hitting the gym was mandatory, for today is designated for strength. the few hours of shut eye took a toll on me and took me a few hours to halt the lethargy. since i anticipated on training, i didn’t want to eat and went with the banana i stuffed down an hour ago. making my way to the gym with an empty stomach and was probably a horrible idea. i knew it was going to be a grind, but feels good to still have gotten through the heavy big lifts. with all that delay, i didn’t get any food in me until roughly half past five. need to be cautious not to be malnutritioned where all my meals are jumbled up like today 

mental game

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bad habits always gets me. every time i feel like i am in exhaustion, i will stop short of completion and make myself believe enough is enough. i have just come to accept the fact that my mental game is not as strong as it needs to be, and that there’s nothing i can do to improve that aspect. this shortcoming is probably an explanation as to why my game has remained stagnant over the years, where i stop short and fail to take my game to the next level. and this only becomes a cyclical process where when i don’t perform well, i tend to hang my head but not focus on finding the underlying problems and dealing with it head on. just today i was reminded that my body is stronger than i think and when fatigue sets in, the mind is usually the first to give in. so when training in and out of the gym, or anywhere for that matter, it is as much training for my mentality as it is for my physicality. it is good that i get to work alongside some of the most motivational individuals because reality is i need constant reminder that i must stop at nothing until i push out the last rep of the last set. the kind of people that are never satisfied and always challenging me to be better and only then will i come to the realization that i can do things i thought i never could. these individuals keep me honest and lets me know that i ain’t going anywhere until i complete it cause anything below my maximum capability is unacceptable.  i think my recent knee ligament that made me forgo my november competition really caused the damage – in a good way. there’s been a recent spark in me that i want it more than ever before; that i am willing to work hard for what i want to achieve and i am going to tackle my weaknesses head on. i no longer want my game to remain the same. i have some ambitious goals to reach and it certainly wouldn’t reach itself. i am ready to take that next step in further enhancing my game, and i am determined to do whatever it takes. the power is in me and it is up to me to train it to work to live up to my fullest potential. i do believe it is in me

day 824 – quick start

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daylight savings ended last night and that extra hour of sleep is much welcomed for a sleep deprived me, but now is when the darkness really hits us. i need to find the motivation this season when i wake up in night fall and go home in night fall. starting off november with a gym session is a step in the right direction, even though i am outright sore. even then i would call it a good start to the month and hopefully stays that way. the next couple months will be busy and important, but november is crucial for all turning points. it’s time to grind everyday out and learn a little something about accountability