day 2189 – fainty

been a while since i had it so bad. so bad that i left work early and took a nap in my car before i knew i was in condition to be behind the wheel. the fact that i nearly fainted was the reason i skipped out on flipping today and headed home. i was pretty sad but it left me with no choice but to crawl into bed. i hope to feel better tomorrow because i still got work to do, workout to crush and softball to play

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day 1603 – needle poking 


if it weren’t for meeting some crucial deadlines, i shouldn’t even be at work because i felt so faint with low blood pressure. also didn’t help that i could hardly keep my eyes open during work and no amount of caffeine could make a difference. once i was i’m off, i went to poke needles all over my body to fix some overarching issues. i’ve always been the type of person that is willing to do anything to push injuries quicker so i can be game ready – this case is no different. sleeping problems worsened as a result of rising work stress and possibly holiday stress. it’s not a bad thing to be stepping it up, only need to make sure i don’t faint before i get them done

day 1218 – irregularities

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i’ll get use to leaving the house when the sky is still pitch black. but it’ll take much more to adapt to sleeping earlier. stationary objects orbiting around me probably means something isn’t functioning properly. felt so faint for much of the day with a banging headache and stomachache. something is definitely wrong but i’m not sure what; i just know i don’t want to take drugs

take no excuses

image my leg was burning and could not muster another rep so i turned to my kinesiologist and said i am exhausted. he in turn stared at me with little compassion and told me i must tank it and keep going no matter what my body feels. every now and then, he would look over to check on me and tell me not to slack off because he knows me far too well. over the many years, the kins that worked with me knows exactly what i do to get out of doing things i consider difficult. i guess i have developed a slacker reputation and one that will stick with me for as long as i live. they no longer concede to any of my excuses or complaints because know that i give up too easily and only stay within my comfort zone. in other words, unless i puke, faint or die on the spot, i must keep going because he isn’t decreasing the reps or weight. and in at the end i survived it all and knew i had done something right for once. he told me he believed i was strong enough and forced me to find a way to tough it out, all i needed was a push. i’ll take that compliment with me and think about it at home. he also said that training is meant to be hard so to push me to my limit because it’s all about overcoming weaknesses. if the training was easy, i would be cheating myself. thankfully he hadn’t conceded to my whining otherwise i would have taken the easy way out for the two hundred thousandths time

day 406 – concussed again??

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you know something is clearly wrong when i am in bed at 11pm. i felt concussion symptoms throughout the day and nearly fainted while i was merely standing. scary moments when the ground doesn’t feel like the ground and a person doesn’t look like a person. even though this probably should be checked out, i still don’t want to go into see my family doctor. i know my decisions may raise many eyebrows, but i don’t think seeing my family doctor will solve anything