day 1723 – knee down

one knee down and only one working knee left to hobble on. i felt like a genius laying all out to make a beautiful play at handball, but my body isn’t feeling so genius after the adrenaline died down. it’s probably the right decision to skip out on dodgeball when i can’t fully weight bear on that leg. as much as i want to play, i shouldn’t take that risk. what i really need is my physicians but one is on vacation and the other is overtly busy. i’ll manage myself with some home remedies

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day 1394 – speak easy

nationals in the back of my mind the whole day made me so restless. i never expected the decision to be easy to overcome, and i think i handled it the best i could. what made it more difficult was i had no one to speak my mind and made it less inviting when i’m constantly being criticized, teased or ignored. i feel like i’m taking this on alone and less willing to pour my heart out knowing i’m going to get insults. i don’t know how long i can take the punishment

day 1173 – no go

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concluded my month-long debate with a tough decision. my team was shocked with the news, but concerned about my well-being. i’m passing on president cup as i didn’t have enough training time to feel prepared for an international event. i do have every intention to compete at the grassroot competition on the same weekend; couldn’t pass up on both events because my heart wants to compete. there’s no way of hiding my disappointment. i felt so dejected there was no way i could get my head in it to practice today. perhaps when i wake up tomorrow morning, i might feel relieved that at least a decision was made. only time will heal both wounds

fight for it

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very, very late last night, i finally gathered the courage and came to a tough decision to pass up on this year’s us open. this may be a rare opportunity in my lifetime to partake in such a massive event of exceptional calibre. i never ever in my life imagined myself being granted this opportunity but maybe because of that, it instilled so much fear in me. it would have been a superb experience, but not one that i felt i was ready to take on alone. i didn’t feel like my physical capabilities nor my mental game was ready for this level of competition. i can’t deny i am very disappointed i choose to back out of these opens because it’s something i’ve been really looking forward to for months and months. sometimes i think i would hate myself for letting this chance slip away, but it’s a decision i made and one that i will be able to live with. i know that this decision was as tough on me as it was for those who devoted so much time and energy in me – with their heart and soul and giving me only positive encouragements. there’s several individuals i want to single out for they were always around to listen to all my rants, troubles and everything in between. but none more so than the hardass nazi who never stopped believing in me, who listened to my many insecurities and tried to put everything into perspective in order to will me to take the challenge. i can’t express my gratitude for all the support i have received along the way. i am sorry i couldn’t make this happen, i wished i could find the inner strength. i may seem down and out at the moment, but with time i will recuperate and bounce back stronger than before. i haven’t lost my passion for competing, it’s simply a little setback that i must overcome. moving forward, i will work extra hard to better prepare myself for nationals. it’s going to happen

吳若希 – 我沒有傷心

i made this long weekend the deadline to make a big decision as to which path i wanted to take. i think i gave him enough chances and now i’ve made up my mind that it just wasn’t meant to be. the decision is made and i am happy i did because i will be able to live with that rather than having it linger on any longer. being on the edge of a relationship is tough, but i will be alright because love isn’t life’s entirety; life must go on. i am sure there comes a time when i will cross path with someone that was meant to be

twenties series: [three] path

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not everyone has the same strengths and weaknesses. everyone is born with certain gifts, talents and aspirations that will lead them down their own path. just following the a crowd and taking what is deemed a safe route isn’t going to get me anywhere in life. life is all about finding myself and understanding who i really am. that’s what makes me, me. just because i am not taking the same path as my buddies, doesn’t mean that they are not readily available to support me every step of the way. there may be lots of darkness, obstacles and uncertainties but at the end of every tunnel is light that leads to bigger and better things. getting past a stumble or struggle makes all achievements me more appreciative of the success. the decision is mine as to whether i want to go down the easy path and end up doing something i have little interest  in or the less traveled path that will allow me do the things in my realm of interest. all i have to do is accept the challenges and persevere then i am confident i will reach my destination. at the end of the day, i want to feel good taking this path and doing what i do. afterall what comes easy won’t last, what lasts won’t come easy. never divert your path in life due to others opinions