day 944 – dinner in bed

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pretty much in bed all day including eating dinner. for a second my taste buds had no idea what i was swallowing. the combination of a cold and whiplash neck pain kept me from all my activities. lying down, sleeping and taking drugs are the only things i can do at the moment. not the kind of rest days i had in mind but these are the only days i will get rest time because my body simply can’t do anything

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day 943 – multiple misfortunes

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it was a rough night where one misfortune led to the next. began the night already feeling under the weather with a heavy headache but didn’t let that stop me from training and dodgeball. only later did i notice my wrist was bruised from smacking into the barbell racks. at dodgeball, i punched myself in the jaw while pulling my compression sleeve up. my mouth was bleeding, i’m basically icing everything since my jaw is swollen and my neck has a whiplash. it has been that kind of night, i’ll call it an early day

day 797 – trying to train

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attempting to train tonight even though my body just isn’t feeling it but got to try anyways. the long battle of my cold continues well into the second week, it just doesn’t want to leave me alone and let me live regularly. i hate feeling like this, but i also hate missing trainings, practices and games even more. weather isn’t helping at all with the change of temperature and earlier night falls.

a-game at us world open

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there was no shortage of pressure at us world open with the presence of the grandmaster, team of students and their parents. little was said, but this competition would also determine my path moving forward and going to nationals next month. i went into this competition feeling undertrained because of all my commitments with the sunrun, dodgeball, playoffs, demos and coaching duties; too much time spent coaching the kids i left no time for myself. it was a mixed bag of feelings from being emotionally unstable to psychologically drained cause i knew what was on the line, physically fine for the most part other than coping with a bad groin that won’t heal and battling a week-long cold. the pressure was far beyond anything i’ve ever experienced since all my school’s competitors had already finished their events, leaving me last to go on stage so everybody hovered behind my ring. i am not a fan of spotlight and this certainly a lot more attention than i am comfortable with. what made it even more nerve wrecking is i was queued second last in my division meaning i had to go through the pain of watching and waiting for my fellow competitors. i was so nervous i didn’t dare watch any of my competitors or their results. i zoned out everyone who tried to talk to me and only focused on what i had to do. i went out there and did what i had to do, walked off the mats straight to my coach without even looking at my score. i was greeted by high fives and a “pretty good” which meant the world to me cause rarely does he compliment me. everybody was quick to tell me i secured at least a silver medal based on the scores of those who went before me. i didn’t believe it, but came to realization as the final results were announced. it wasn’t the medal around my neck that brought joy to me, it was beating my biggest rival from my own school and that proved plenty, more than words can say. most importantly i felt good out there doing what i thought was my best poomsae and best performance yet. the silver lining was i later found out the mexican who topped my score was the bronze medallist at this year’s worlds. thankfully i was told after the fact or i would be too psyched out, as if i didn’t have enough pressure

day 643 – crazy weather

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looked outside the window every hour and each time i felt like i was in a different city other than vancity. there was a mixture of sunshine, drizzle, rain and hail all throughout the day. vancouver just can’t seem to make up its mind on what season it is so it throws us a little bit of everything. but one thing that didn’t change is i am still sick like there’s no tomorrow